As a queer person, it's long been my dream to see my community represented in the lowest form of entertainment: The Bachelor.
On Wednesday, comedian Billy Eichner decided to rise to the challenge and offer himself up as fresh meat. "I actually do think it would be cool to do a gay season of The Bachelor," Eichner wrote, "and hey @BachelorABC, I'm single."
Eichner's tweet was met with non-ironic enthusiasm on Twitter. FYI, haters: The LGBTQ community likes trash corporate television like the rest of y'all. Just because it's heteronormative poison doesn't mean we're not on board! We, too, love passing fauxmances and manufactured drama between morons.
The time has come for queer and trans bachelor(ette)s to reclaim this cultural wasteland.
SEE ALSO: The best queer moments in culture in 2018It's never been a better time for a queer bachelor. 2018 included multiple, painful queer breakups. And the Queer Eyeguys showed the world they can be even more popular than the straights on streaming television. Even if you hate The Bachelor (highly understandable), queer representation matters, wherever you can find it.
Here are the queer and trans celebrities we believe are single (though of course these things can change) and could most benefit from a scripted romance:
Jonathan Van Ness is one of those rare celebrities who's loved both by the normies and the radical queers alike. We all grieved for Jonathan after his relationship ended with soccer player Wilco Froneman this winter. Now we all hope for the same thing for him: the opportunity to go an ice-skating date with a big ol' gay bear on broadcast television.
Now that the arm wrestling posts have stopped, it's believed that queer couple King Princess and Amandla Sternberg has gone their separate ways. It's fine, it's not like we were depending on two 24-year-olds in the throes of young love for our personal happiness.
The Hate U Givestar probably hates this show. We'd like to offer her the opportunity anyways.
View this post on Instagram
Listen, we're not taking sides in this breakup, okay? They're both very good on Instagram.
View this post on Instagram
Jesus might have been single, but "Lesbian Jesus" doesn't have to be. Just imagine the brutal take-down pop anthems she'll make when she inevitably dumps whatever silicone dud wins the show.
ThisTransparentstar and trans advocate is far too good for The Bacheloretteor anything on network television, but in the event she feels like dipping her toe into our disgusting lowbrow universe, we're here.
View this post on Instagram
Single or not, it doesn't matter: Everyone [who is good] wants this trans model and activist to achieve maximum possible representation. The world is a far hotter place because of him.
He's here, he's queer, and he could theoretically be single. Please sign this actor-singer-beautiful-human up.
Based on recent interviews, it no longer appears that she and Tessa Thompson are dating one another. And unfortunately for Janelle, no one is good enough to be at her level. It'll be cute to watch her lessers try.
View this post on Instagram
Abbi Jacobson came out as queer earlier this year and frankly it's all I've been able to think about since. Someone please put her on the show so I can get back to my normal life, aka googling other queer celebrities.
I can't think of anyone who would hate being on The Bachelormore than the incredibly talented and deeply, darkly funny Alia Shawkat. Still, good entertainment.
Male model Nyle DiMarco is rumored to be both single and kind. How rare a combination is that? Someone please find him love.
Billy Eichner runs a good goddamn show and is one of the few smart people on Twitter. Most importantly, he's big and famous and he offered to do it.
Sorry, Michelle Obama. For some kinds of change, we need more people who are high to stoop low. That's just how this country works.
文章
8
浏览
467
获赞
597
Facebook and Instagram just made high
Facebook is making a push to increase the information you can see on posts from high-reach FacebookGreta Thunberg changes her Twitter bio to Trump quote
Will Greta Thunberg be the hero who saves the word "clapback?"Less than a day after Donald Trump mocBig UN extinction crisis report paints grim future for life on Earth
Extinction is coming.Though, in large part, it already has. On Monday, the United Nation's IntergoveToday I learned my iPhone has this cool AI feature that proves its smarts
I scrambled for my iPhone 15 Pro Max after reading about a cool AI-powered feature.As it turns out,This alignment test will tell you if you're a stupid horny baby
People online love a good alignment test. They also love to say "I'm baby." Here's something that coSamsung Galaxy S24 vs S22: The biggest upgrades
Opens in a new windowGoogle releases sneak peek of its Super Bowl commercial
One of the more preposterous things about the Super Bowl is how we get commercials for upcoming commInstagram, Threads to stop recommending some political content
As the 2024 U.S. election nears, social media platforms are trying to avoid repeating their past misEU is investigating Apple Pay and App Store for breaking competition rules
The European Commission has launched two formal investigations into Apple's business practices overAmazon Fire Max 11 tablet deal
SAVE $80:As of Jan. 8, you can score an Amazon Fire Max 11 tablet for just $199.99, down from $279.9Mark Zuckerberg tried the Vision Pro. Here's what he thinks about it.
Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg is a bit of an OG when it comes to mixed/augmented/virtual reality headsetsCES 2024: 5 car trends we're expecting to see
CES, perhaps the premier conference for new tech, has become a major conference for news in the carGoFundMe bans anti
GoFundMe is cracking down on anti-vaxxers.The popular fundraising website says it will no longer allBest Amazon device deal: Amazon Smart Thermostat on sale for $59.99
Save $20: As of December 14, the Amazon Smart Thermostat is on sale for $59.99 at Amazon, which is 2Amazon Echo device sale: Get up to 40% off
UP TO 40% OFF: As of Feb. 5, you can score up to 40% off select Echo devices, including the Echo Sho